Love is a need
6/8/20232 min read
Affirmation: Every cell is alive with love.
One of my favorite things to guess about a person is their love language. If love languages are new to you, a philosopher named Gary Chapman wrote the five love languages. In the book, he shares how he learned the five ways people give and receive love through his clients. They include quality time, acts of service, words of affirmation, physical touch, and giving/ receiving gifts. "What's your love language" is also one of my favorite questions to ask a person because you get closer to understanding what they need and who they are.
I've recently been exploring love outside of just the five languages; because I always get people who say,' "My love language is food In a couple of weeks of allowing love to journey outside of its box, I remembered just how expansive love could be. During this time, I recalled a talk with my friend, where I profusely argued my belief in unconditional love--both its existence and power. I didn't make any groundbreaking discoveries about if there are more than five love languages.
However, I did have a small revelation about how simple it could be. When you relate love to needs, you get words like; Unconditional love, passionate love, consistent love, and soft love. What we need in love varies on our relationship with a specific person, what stage of life we're in, and what type of love we experienced or did not experience in the past.
I then started to spiral into specific types of love that people need. It looked like me placing hundreds of words in front of love. Playful love, passionate love, healthy love, comforting love, enduring love, soft love, and familiar love. As much as we have grown an understanding of types of love and needs, we rarely tie the two. So my challenge to you is for you to meet your love needs.
Here are a couple of tips!
1. Don't only think of romantic partners.
• Think of the type of love you need from friends, family, or your children.
2. Ask yourself, "What type of love do I try to give to other people?"
• In a way, we naturally treat people how we expect or want to be treated. So, if you constantly show enduring love to others, you might need enduring love in return.
3. Don't count yourself out of meeting these needs!
• You can most definitely meet your love needs! This might look different than someone else meeting them, but today we are thinking outside love, like in the example above. It could look like gentler speech when you do something "wrong," like waking up late or completely forgetting about a meeting or assignment. Giving yourself comforting love could look like reassuring affirmations and a soft blanket.
We all have needs (as discussed earlier this year), and we all need love. But the type of love we need is as diverse as we are, and it varies on the relationship with a specific person, what stage of life you're in, and what type of love you experienced or didn't experience.
Edited affirmation - Every cell is alive with -- love!
Ps. While we are placing words in front of love, I want to add "self-love." The goal in sharing this post is not to make any of you more lovable to another person, and the goal is for you to look in the mirror and at your relationships and feel the same love you feel!